Fear of Online Dating Turns Into A Choice of Love


Love Is A Choice

I (Lynn) didn’t date very many people and I was very scared of online dating. I had the idea that only desperate people tried online dating. I was convinced I’d meet a serial killer if I tried it. Anyway, my older sister and a couple of my cousins had tried Catholic Match without success in the past. A few years ago I had tried the site and actually met a pretty nice man, but he wasn’t the right man for me. Since I was in nursing school, I let my subscription lapse.

As soon as I graduated, my younger sister and I were talking about how hard it was to meet nice Catholic men. She had looked at the site and really wanted to join. So, the two of us both signed up. When I signed up the second time I talked to a lot of different guys. My future husband had actually just sent me a nice little emoticon that said something like he was praying for me or have a nice day or something. I didn’t think much of it and figured I’d be nice and just send him a message back. Little did I know that he had sent out a bunch of similar messages. After that he sent me an e-mail on the site. My attitude was that nothing serious could come of our correspondence because he was a few years younger than me and I had never seriously considered dating a younger man. I did think that there was no harm in getting to know him because I figured I could never have too many friends.

We wrote emails back and forth for a few weeks and then it somehow progressed to me giving my husband my number and him calling me. I started to change my mind and think John might be a man with a lot of potential. After talking on the phone for a few weeks we finally agreed to meet in person. We met in a public place due to my wariness of online dating. John was nothing like what I expected. We went to lunch and then he asked me to go to the museum of all places. I have to admit I was really scared because John seemed like a nice guy and I had never really been able to find a nice guy. I did a lot of praying and accepted another date. I think it was the third date that we really sat down and discussed important parts of our life experiences and what we were looking for in a spouse. We had many of the same beliefs on love being a choice and agreed that marriage was a lifetime commitment. We both understood that if our relationship were to progress to marriage it would have it’s ups and downs and that we would trust God to help us through them. I also realized that John really helped me to become a better Catholic. I was raised Catholic and he was a convert. He had done a lot of reading whereas my faith was based very much on just that, blind faith. We dated for a few months before he proposed. Of course, he went all out and planned a romantic proposal in Germany (we had gone there for my niece’s baptism and I was the Godmother).

Our relationship has had its up and downs, but one thing is for sure, God has been with us the whole way. I prayed long and hard before I came to the conclusion that he was a gentleman with whom I could spend the rest of my life. I also knew John possessed many of the chraacteristics most important to me in a prospective spouse… a strong faith, intelligence, and integrity.





28 Comments

  1. Nicholas-124272 September 6, 2010

    Awesome!

    • Ana-473586 September 9, 2010

      Thank you for writing this , your first few sentences could have been written by me, I’ll keep at it and hope to have a good outcome.

  2. Julia-592990 September 8, 2010

    God is good, and He is great in your relationship.
    Thanks for sharing. God bless.

  3. Jorge-497354 September 8, 2010

    love this story. thank you for posting

  4. Likha-614934 September 9, 2010

    anything is possible with God.

  5. Michelle-346850 September 11, 2010

    Thanks for sharing your story! It’s an encouragement to read.

  6. Mercedes-623710 September 11, 2010

    Your witness was very inspiring! I was speaking today with a friend today who also feels uncomfortable with meeting anyone online. She wants to meet someone naturally either in church or at a social event. Also, a few days ago, a dear friend indirectly stated that the guy who was online must be desperate. Thank you for sharing your experience! I am slowly becoming more comfortable with it!

  7. Elaine-607083 September 12, 2010

    yup this is why i have so much fear and alot questions :((

  8. Micheal-626388 September 13, 2010

    This is great i pray i have a story like yours soon

  9. Vernice-593987 September 18, 2010

    beautiful. thanks for sharing.

  10. Luz-38341 September 21, 2010

    This is a lovely story, thanks for sharing with us, everything is possible for God and when we colaborate with Him and put all in His hands. Many blessings for you!

  11. Beverly-429771 September 23, 2010

    I think this is a great story… and covers all the parameters of why people are a little leary about internet datin….

  12. Candace-587406 September 24, 2010

    Thanks for being so candid about the downs in your relationship, because no love sotry is perfect.

  13. Miriam-578086 September 29, 2010

    great story!

  14. Great story, very down to earth. Congrats!!

  15. Mary-622130 October 6, 2010

    I love this story! Indeed there are many fears, it is then that our faith is tested… “The LORD is on my side; I will not fear: what can man do to me?” Psalm 118:6 / What then shall we say to this? If God is on our side, who is there to appear against us? Romans 8:31. Many blessings to all and to you and your family Lynn.

  16. Anna-635092 October 11, 2010

    Sweet story, and I appreciate her sharing it since I also share her apprehensions on joining site. Again, thanks & finding how God can direct us so beautifully if we just stay “plugged in” to hear His whispers in our ears.

  17. Carib-638015 October 14, 2010

    Inspiring:)

  18. Diane-481644 October 25, 2010

    Lynn,
    That’s a fabulous story. I love it. You sound like me in what I thought of online dating before I tried it. Now, I won’t give up. Thank you for sharing and I hope that you and John have a very happy and lasting marriage.

  19. Anne-629611 October 25, 2010

    Have the same feelings great story. God bless.

    • Absolutely wonderful and inspiring story!! May God bless you and your spouse with health, wealth and happiness all the days of your life. I pray that our Mother will also be there to guide you and that St. Michael may be present to guard you from all attacks on your marriage. Congratulations!!!!
      God bless.
      Guin

  20. Donna-603649 November 4, 2010

    I think your story is everyone’s hope that is on this website. Let us pray for each other that we find the same type of love story as yours… Congratulations on finding each other ! Blessings to you both !

  21. Katie-443543 November 5, 2010

    this is a really good story! :) thanks for sharing it and God bless you both :)

  22. Debra-651556 November 23, 2010

    She is older than him. No way! I thought she was much younger than him.

  23. wow, congratulations to the both of you! you’re love story is very inspiring. God bless your marriage life.

  24. Lilian-562782 December 7, 2010

    John from Cork, where are you?

  25. Lilian-562782 December 7, 2010

    John from Cork where are you???

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