My 1st Forum Post: Who Makes The First Move?


The age-old question: Who should make the first move?

When I joined CatholicMatch, I promised myself that I would use all of the tools available to me, from the emotigrams to the chat feature to the forums. Three weeks ago, I started my very first forum thread in the Tobias & Sarah room after a fellow CatholicMatcher commented on my blog post, “5 Questions From A CatholicMatch Newbie.”

Titled “When will we actually meet in person,” my post raised the question of how or when you should suggest a face-to-face meeting with a match.

“CatholicMatch veterans, what has been your experience in the past? Obviously, I think you need to have some back and forth to get to know a person before meeting in person, but doesn’t it have to eventually lead to an in-person meeting if things are on the right track? I don’t want to spend months messaging someone back and forth only to meet them in person 6 months down the road and not feel any sparks or see a future together,” I wrote.

My post garnered 18 responses, which I thoroughly enjoyed reading. Some of my favorites:

“My suggestion is to NOT let the phone calls and emails go on too long before meeting. One can give away one’s heart through all the phone calls and emails, but when they meet, they can find a clear lack of attraction – then both are deeply disappointed.”
-MaryAlice-97161

“I think plans need to be made for a meeting as quickly as humanly possible. Too many of these online situations drag on for far too long.” -Donna-83441

“There are no hard-set, blanket rules that can apply to all situations when it is best to meet. If things are clicking with emails or phone calls, then why wouldn’t both parties want to meet if possible?” -Richard-632838

These great suggestions were what I needed to finally propose my first face-to-face meeting. If we’re both on an online dating site, I thought to myself, shouldn’t we, in fact, date?

Less than 24 hours after sending my short message, I received an enthusiastic reply:

“I would love to meet up. What day works for you?”






1 Comment »

  1. Rebecca-767861 December 6, 2011 Reply

    this article makes alot of sense!

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