Rate Your Date


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According to Business Insider, there’s a new app called LuLu where women can anonymously rate men they’ve dated.

“On Lulu, men aren’t allowed in, and women can  anonymously rate them without their consent. The men, who are all guys the women know via Facebook, are rated on a scale of one to ten. Their profiles are automatically pulled in when the women they know access Lulu. When rating a man, women are prompted to share how they know him (friend,  ex-girlfriend, etc), then asked to check off all the good and bad qualities about the man that apply.”

So now instead of venting to your friends over a glass of wine or two you can broadcast to the entire world why your relationship didn’t work out or why you don’t like (or do like, in rare cases) so and so.

It sounds like something high school mean girls would come up with. It is easy to condemn/malign/gossip about another person. There’s nothing insecure bullies love doing more than making other people feel bad about themselves.

But according to LuLu users, this app isn’t about being catty and immature, its about female empowerment and collective wisdom.

Yeah, right, because you know the absolute hellfire that would be raised if the situation was reverse. 

Besides being very uncharitable, the rating system on LuLu is also very objectifying—not to mention a total invasion of the guy’s privacy (whose facebook profiles and information are used without their permission).

There’s a tendency nowadays to think that anonymous comments posted online are innocuous. But they can be very damaging and devastating. When posting things online one tends to be much crueler than one would be face to face.

Remember that anything posted online is permanent. Anything you write can always come back and haunt you. Even twitter tweets are filed away in the Library of Congress for posterity

Before you rate your past boyfriend, keep in mind that sometimes things just don’t work out between two people. It doesn’t necessarily make anyone the bad guy.

How many times has a couple had a terrible relationship and then the next person they date turns out to be just right and things go so smoothly?

When you break up with someone, the mature thing to do is to vent if you must and then move on. There’s no need to resort to this sort of immature and cruel behavior.

We all have dignity and that should be respected. If women don’t want to be treated like disposable objects, then they should not treat men that way. Certainly we value the advice and opinions of our friends, but this gossip app is damaging.

As my mother would say  “How would you like this done to you?”






9 Comments

  1. Gary-936836 May 13, 2013 Reply

    Thank you, Heather. There is more to us men than just our stone-hard biceps.

    My eyes are up here, thank you.

  2. Mike-646924 May 13, 2013 Reply

    I;am Glad idon’t have “Face Book”!! lol lol

  3. Emmanuel-940296 May 13, 2013 Reply

    “Defamation—also called calumny, vilification, or traducement—is the communication of a factual statement that harms the reputation of an individual, business, product, group, government, religion, or nation. Most jurisdictions allow legal action to deter various kinds of defamation and retaliate against groundless criticism. Under common law, to constitute defamation, a claim must generally be false and have been made to someone other than the person defamed.”

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defamation

    So how is this app legal?

  4. Emmanuel-940296 May 13, 2013 Reply

    In retrospect, the app’s legality actually makes sense, but defamation could be involved on an individual basis, assuming the app allows the person to write whatever they want about that person in addition to just being able to rate them across a variety of things.

  5. Mary-784275 May 13, 2013 Reply

    Thank you for this story Heather. It is very disturbing to me that this app even exists. What is our world coming to? For all the men who become victims of this, I am so deeply sorry. For all the women that use this app, SHAME ON YOU! May Almighty God help us all!

  6. Navin-972160 May 13, 2013 Reply

    Very interesting

  7. Cindy-681844 May 14, 2013 Reply

    For some reason this seems sad

  8. David-870960 May 14, 2013 Reply

    This, aside from seeming a bit despicable, begs for someone “on the inside” to expose any outright injustice and perhaps bring it to a halt. On the other hand, if some guy is abusive or worse, it should be reported to proper authority. Given today’s hiring practices, and the prominence of women in Human Resources positions, this could easily be another ‘look up’ as has become a practice (Facebook searches, “Googling” a person, etc…) Big Brother has a name, and it is not a Heavenly one!

  9. Mary-732729 May 15, 2013 Reply

    What will our world think up next? Will we ever learn?

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